Or you could just build a windmill
Although pleasantly mesmerizing in a “your office building essentially a metal windsock” sort of way, this plan to build a rotating tower operated by wind-power seems to have several notable flaws. The first involves window washers. Because, splat. The second involves the distinct possibility that residents/occupants would vom after, oh, I don’t know, ten to twelve rotations. Hope you don’t have vertigo.
Also – plumbing? Is there a central, non-rotating core? There must be, right? Because, yikes. And then there are the elevators. Oh, the elevators. You’d have to circle the floor every day to find where your office has moved to.
But I’ll admit, it would be cool to press a button and have your floor spin around. This whole thing is vaguely reminiscent of the Ministry of Magic in Harry Potter, except that they changed the view outside of the window through magic. Although, come to think of it, a spinning turbine building is pretty damn close to magic.
Go on, watch it spin. And try to imagine the theme to Disney’s Pocahontas playing in the background:
Construction to Start on Rotating Wind-Power Tower [EcoGeek]
This will totally work.
Hey, this is a really excellent, revolutionary idea: an eco-friendly alternative to traditional gas-powered vehicles! A vehicle that runs on completely renewable energy! If only we had thought of this sooner! Some sort of car that doesn’t require gasoline and whose energy source could be made completely renewable!
It’s here, folks. The hydrogen powered car. The answer to all our problems.
Well, except for these two flaws that the article cites:
1. Hydrogen is costly to produce, and in fact that it is most commonly produced using fossil fuels (thus solving neither our reliance on fossil fuels nor the high cost of gas)
and
2. The overall carbon dioxide emissions from these vehicles are actually higher than those of gasoline or diesel powered vehicles! (take that, environment!)
So yeah, definitely a step in the right direction. Except for that part where it is actually worse than the technology we have now.
Meet George Jetson!
Tomorrow’s Green Mega-City, today! The cars are like shopping carts! The buses don’t have drivers! (note: I actually find this completely terrifying). The houses are bubbles! (note the irony of literally living in a bubble).
Go, behold the futuristic power of flash media. And ask yourself: where are the ecopoli?
And then President Bush ate a kitten.
I mean, seriously? If this court decision were a Disney movie, all the little Arctic animals, from chubby penguins to a school of baby beluga whales to the wide-eyed harp seals, would rise up in protest. It would be one of those plots where the Evil Villain makes an Laughably Ridiculous and Generally Evil decision, and the hoards wildlife creatures, with innocence and possibly a fairy godmother on their side, would band together to overcome adversity through song and/or dance. The walruses would provide the bass-line in a catchy protest song with a call and response chorus from the seabirds.
I mean, come on, President Bush – what’s next, kicking the iceburg out from underneath a tired baby polar bear?
Not your mama’s Senate, either
Someone in the Senate has a sense of humor. The Climate Security Act, introduced by Senators Joseph I. Lieberman (ID-CT) and John W. Warner (R-VA), proposes to lower CO2 emissions 70% by 2050 (close to the 80% that leading NASA climatologist James Hansen recommends). Claiming they did not have enough time to read it, leaders of the Republican party demanded that the 492 page bill be read out loud in its entirety in a remarkably juvenile effort to kill the bill’s momentum.
The bill was eventually pulled after three and a half days of debate (well, three days of debate, half a day of what essentially amounted to story time), to prevent a Republican filibuster (the vacuum cleaner of choice for young horses).
I would love to hear the discussion that prompted this decision. I imagine it was something along the lines of passing notes in study hall — except that instead of reading “hey you think we can convince the substitute that our regular teacher gives us all the answers to our homework?” they read “hey, do you think we can trick the Senate into having to read the entire bill out loud for three to five hours instead of talking about it?” And, instead of junior high, it was, you know, the Senate.
Now it has gone too far
Finally, a way to rally the American public around climate change. This article indicates that, (in addition to causing widespread food and water shortages throughout the poorest nations), droughts induced by climate change will also negatively impact barley production, leading to higher beer prices, beer shortages, and a possibly altered taste. If PBR loses its signature urine-esque aftertaste and begins selling everywhere for the five dollars a pint it is up to in Boston, I for one will devote (more) of my life to fighting climate change. Perhaps the lilypad cities can set sail for Australia and New Zealand, where most of the barley is grown, pool their water resources, and begin a floating undergound (abovesea?) moonshine market.
Climate change: secret weapon of the Temperance movement?
Lilypad Cities
Perhaps the greatest thing to come out of climate change since a year-round market for short shorts, Helen sends us what can only be described as crazy floating lilypad cities.
Proposed as “luxurious future retreat” for the wealthiest on the planet, these ecopolises (ecopoli?) would allow members of rich nations to jump ship from, well, land, and take up residence on a permanent floating cruise ship while the rest of the world, busy with the business of fighting over fresh water and scarce food supplies, watches from the shore. This can only lead to one thing: climate pirates!
Crazy Lilypad City + No More Food and Water = CLIMATE PIRATES!?
